My romance was with Calia too, and the quest in it's natural order was to first talk with Jespar on the deck before going in (which can just end in friendship talk), and LASTLY with Calia as after Calia the screen goes black then you pop on top of the airship as it's approaching the floating city (after a good morning, after a good long night).
I suppose that's all which went wrong, doing the quests in the wrong order ?